Being a mother is not about what you gave up to have a child, but what you’ve gained from having one.
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My children’s laughter is my favorite sound. The sound of their deep breating when I know they’re asleep is a close second.
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I was going to clean my house but then someone commented on my facebook status
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A little sand between your toes takes away your woes.
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Now I understand why Peter Pan didn’t want to grow up.
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If insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results … then I guess I’ll stop cleaning the house!
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Remember – as far as anyone knows, we are a nice normal family!
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Woo hoo, it’s Friday! Oh wait – I’m a mom. I don’t get weekends off.
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I Love Chocolate
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Stop waiting for things to happen go out and make them happen
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How a female sees 1 inch, How a male sees 1 inch, How a hairdresser sees 1 inch.
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I finally know what skinny feels like … it feels like hungry.
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Three C’s of life choices, chances, changes I must make a choice to take a chance on my life will never change.
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Recipe for disaster: when your country has an obesity epidemic in a skinny jean fad at same time.
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I’m not clumsy … The floor just hates me, the table and chairs are bullies and the walls get in my way
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Why can’t Pinterest be my job? I’m so good at it.
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I’m having the worst Monday since last Monday
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Dear best friend: I honestly don’t know what I would do without you.
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Motherhood takes patience, a sense of humor and moist towelettes
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Children learn to smile from their parents
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Never, Never, Never, Never, Give Up!
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There are four very important words if life, love, honesty, truth and respect without these wife would be pointless.
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It’s Saturday night and I’m home on Facebook. Don’t laugh, so are you.
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Someday we will all find out is Pinterest is a conspiracy created by a team of men who are tricking women everywhere into cooking, cleaning, and working out.
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They should make a version of Rosetta Stone that teaches clueless men to understand what women are saying!
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Whoever said money can’t buy happiness has clearly never been to Target.
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I think we should change the saying ‘I slept like a baby.’ to ‘I slept like a husband.’
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I really miss the days when my toughest decision on Saturday morning was which cartoon watch
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I have the best MOM in the world
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You are the icing on my cupcake
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Everyone thinks that a girl’s dream is to find the perfect guy. Please, every girls dream is to get them by eating cupcakes!
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My House was clean then the kids woke up.
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Whoever said “M&M’s melt in your mouth, not in your hand” never gave a handful to a 2-year old!
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I live in a madhouse ruled by a tiny army …that I made myself
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Sometimes I look forward to going to bed at night because I know that when I wake up, I get coffee!
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I don’t know what is scarier … that my daughter is starting to act like me or that I am starting to act like my mother!
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